How are you a strong mom? What are your weaknesses? Do you aim for perfection as a mom or do you just try to stick to what you’re good at?
Photo by Janelandryphotography.com
All the ways I am not a strong mom
Is it weird that I am completely at a loss by the question, What are your strengths as a mom?
When you ask me my weaknesses I can give you quite a laundry list.
I get stressed easily
I yell when I’m stressed
I need A LOT more patience
I get too emotional in front of my kids
I don’t keep up with laundry ( hello sour-smelling t-shirts)
I don’t think I play enough
I am not super goofy and silly
I get distracted by my phone
I get frustrated
My house is usually unorganized
I am not the best at lunches
I lose artwork
I’ve missed birthday parties because of a poor calendar
And NONE of my photos are organized
Oh, and Morning routines over here are AWFUL….. Like I would borderline homeschool to avoid them but I think I may melt like the wicked witch of the West if I took that on right now.
That is just the tip of the iceberg.
Dealing with mom guilt on repeat
To be honest with you guys sitting here thinking about it, probably the greatest weakness I have encountered in motherhood is feeling defined by my weaknesses. Does that even make sense? I have always had a tendency to put a ton of pressure on myself and think of the millions of ways I could improve. I think women do this in general.
I have laid awake many nights feeling guilty for the ways I have lost my cool with my kids and the little moments I have rushed through.. Then I go kiss my them on the head, sleep in their beds, cry, and thank God they are mine and that his mercies are new every morning. How is that for dramatic.
For some reason, it has been so easy for me to see the strength of other moms and call them out. Its second nature for me to see the awesome job they are doing and tell them to not be too hard on themselves saying “I GET IT! Give yourself a break and know you are exactly what your kids need,” And then I turn around and struggle to give myself the same grace. I am not an insecure person by any means, raising kids is just something that feels so beyond a normal responsibility.
Photo by https://janelandryphotography.com/
Where our Strength in Motherhood really lies
I’ve looked a lot for outside affirmation; like for my mom to tell me I am doing a great job, which she does sometimes, but my kids always act up at her house. Or for my husband to walk in the door after a crazy long day and say to me “hey you are amazing, I don’t know how you do it.” As if somehow that means that I am.
And don’t get me wrong, I think encouraging each other daily is one of the greatest gifts we can give in the motherhood community. It is so needed and one of the main reasons I started my Instagram account and blog. But the truth is how much stronger would we be if we could find that inner voice saying, “good job today, you gave it your all, you are stronger than you know, and every way you may have failed, God made up the difference.”
2 Corinthians 12:9 Says :
“My grace is ALL YOU NEED. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ can work through me.
At the end of the day, my only real strength in motherhood is my serious need to rely completely on God; That I am putting all of my weaknesses on him daily and trading them for his strength. And when I do this, I can feel him helping me. I can feel the moments with my kids being sweeter.
There is no way we can really expect perfection out of ourselves because we are imperfect people. All I know is that I adore my kids, I am committed to my core to let them know how much I love them and how much God loves them even more than I do. I pray they grow up with deep-rooted confidence in how much they are loved and that they too can trust God in their weaknesses and continue to grow because of that. The rest of my motherhood is just details.
Photo by https://janelandryphotography.com/
How Our Kids See Us
I asked my kids how I am a strong mom but in layman’s terms. When Am I a good mom? When am I a bad mom? I laughed at their responses.
My 4-year-old son immediately answered You are best when you take me to Flying Spider ( trampoline park). You are not the best when you don’t take me to Flying Spider. ( So there you have it)
And my 6-year-old daughter, who has definitely gotten the worst of my fading patience level told me I was HER most perfect mom in the world. I about cried. All the ways I think I am failing her, she doesn’t even see them. Her mercies are new every morning for me too, every hour.
So maybe you have a lot of strengths, maybe you have a few more weaknesses, but if you are committed to raising your kids to feel unconditionally loved and trust God, your strengths will shine even when you don’t realize it. I am eternally grateful for that and hope it helps you rest easy in your motherhood today. That is how to be a strong mom.
Another Tip to being a Strong mom is taking time to get Strong. Check out this spa day I planned with two of my best friends in an effort for self care.